Yes I know it was only sent recently. But it has uses.
With help from Giles.
STANDARDIZED TROLL REPLY FORM
(c) copyright 1999 by
someone else.
(check all boxes that apply)
Dear:
[X] Clueless Newbie [x] Lamer [x] Flamer
[X] Loser [XXXXXXX] Spammer [x] Troller
[ ] "Me too" er [X] Pervert [X] Geek
[ ] Freak [X] Nerd [ ] Elvis
[ ] Racist [ ] Fed [X] Freak
[ ] Fundamentalist [ ] Satanist [ ] Homeopath
[ ] Cocksucker [x] Moron [X] Pest
[ ] Transvestite [x] Unbearably self-righteous person
I took exception to your recent:
[x] Email [ ] Post to (newsgroup)
It was (check all that apply):
[x] Lame [x] Stupid [x] Abusive
[x] Clueless [x] Idiotic [ ] Brain-damaged
[x] Imbecilic [x] Arrogant [ ] Malevolent
[x] Contemptible [ ] Libelous [x] Ignorant
[x] Clueless [x] Stupid [ ] Fundamentalist
[x] Boring [x] Dim [ ] Cowardly
[ ] Deceitful [x] Demented [x] Self-righteous
[x] Crazy [x] Weird [ ] Hypocritical
[ ] Loathsome [ ] Satanic [ ] Despicable
[x] Belligerent [x] Mind-numbing [ ] Maladroit
[x] Much longer than any worthwhile thought of which you may be
capable.
Your attention is drawn to the fact that:
[ ] You posted what should have been emailed
[ ] You obviously don't know how to read your newsgroups line
[ ] You are trying to make money on a non-commercial newsgroup
[ ] You self-righteously impose your religious beliefs on others
[ ] You self-righteously impose your racial beliefs on others
[ ] You posted a binary in a non-binaries group
[ ] You don't know which group to post in
[x] You posted something totally uninteresting
[ ] You crossposted to *way* too many newsgroups
[x] I don't like your tone of voice
[ ] What you posted has been done before.
[ ] Not only that, it was also done better the last time.
[ ] You quoted an *entire* post in your reply
[x] You started a long, stupid thread
[ ] You continued spreading a long stupid thread
[x] Your post is absurdly off topic for where you posted it
[ ] You posted a followup to crossposted robot-generated spam
[ ] You posted a "test" in a discussion group rather than in alt.test
[x] You posted a "YOU ALL SUCK" message
[x] You posted low-IQ flamebait
[x] You posted a blatantly obvious troll
[ ] You followed up to a blatantly obvious troll
[ ] You said "me too" to something
[x] You make no sense
[ ] Your sig/alias is dreadful
[x] You must have spent your life in a skinner box to be this
clueless.
[ ] You posted a phone-sex ad
[ ] You posted a stupid pyramid money making scheme
[ ] You claimed a pyramid-scheme/chain letter for money was legal
[ ] Your margin settings (or lack of) make your post unreadable. Each
line just goes on and on, not stopping at 75 characters, making it
hard to read.
[ ] You posted in ELitE CaPitALs to look k0OwL
[ ] You posted a message in ALL CAPS, and you don't even own a TRS-80
[ ] Your post was FULL of RANDOM CAPS for NO APPARENT REASON
[x] You have greatly misunderstood the purpose of this mailing list.
[x] You have greatly misunderstood the purpose of the Internet.
[x] You are a loser.
[ ] This has been pointed out to you before.
[ ] You didn't do anything specific, but appear to be so generally
worthless that you are being flamed on general principles.
[x] You obviously can't read the FAQ.
[x] You obviously only post with one hand, while the other is busy
with self-gratification.
It is recommended that you:
[x] Get a clue
[x] Get a life
[x] Go away
[x] Grow up
[x] Never post again
[ ] Read every newsgroup you posted to for a week
[ ] stop reading Usenet news and get a life
[x] stop sending Email and get a life
[x] Bust up your modem with a hammer and eat it
[x] Have your medication adjusted
[x] Jump into a bathtub while holding your monitor
[x] find a volcano and throw yourself in
[ ] get a gun and shoot yourself
[x] Actually post something relevant
[ ] Read the FAQ
[ ] stick to FidoNet and come back when you've grown up
[x] Apologize to everybody in this mailing list
[ ] consume excrement
[x] consume excrement and thus expire
[x] get laid and expire
[ ] Post your tests to alt.test/misc.test
[ ] Put your home phone number in your ads from now on
[x] Refrain from posting until you have a vague idea what you're doing
In Closing, I'd Like to Say:
[ ] You need to seek psychiatric help
[x] Take your gibberish somewhere else
[x] *plonk*
[ ] Learn how to post or get off the usenet
[x] You need to take your head out of your ass
[x] You should be neutered before becoming old enough to breed
[ ] Most of the above
[x] All of the above
[ ] Some of the above, not including All of the above
[ ] You are so clueless that I didn't even bother filling in this
form
Chris Lyth
...................................................
I'm not sexist. I just don't trust anything that can bleed for 5
days and not die.
With help from Giles.
STANDARDIZED TROLL REPLY FORM
(c) copyright 1999 by
someone else.
(check all boxes that apply)
Dear:
[X] Clueless Newbie [x] Lamer [x] Flamer
[X] Loser [XXXXXXX] Spammer [x] Troller
[ ] "Me too" er [X] Pervert [X] Geek
[ ] Freak [X] Nerd [ ] Elvis
[ ] Racist [ ] Fed [X] Freak
[ ] Fundamentalist [ ] Satanist [ ] Homeopath
[ ] Cocksucker [x] Moron [X] Pest
[ ] Transvestite [x] Unbearably self-righteous person
I took exception to your recent:
[x] Email [ ] Post to (newsgroup)
It was (check all that apply):
[x] Lame [x] Stupid [x] Abusive
[x] Clueless [x] Idiotic [ ] Brain-damaged
[x] Imbecilic [x] Arrogant [ ] Malevolent
[x] Contemptible [ ] Libelous [x] Ignorant
[x] Clueless [x] Stupid [ ] Fundamentalist
[x] Boring [x] Dim [ ] Cowardly
[ ] Deceitful [x] Demented [x] Self-righteous
[x] Crazy [x] Weird [ ] Hypocritical
[ ] Loathsome [ ] Satanic [ ] Despicable
[x] Belligerent [x] Mind-numbing [ ] Maladroit
[x] Much longer than any worthwhile thought of which you may be
capable.
Your attention is drawn to the fact that:
[ ] You posted what should have been emailed
[ ] You obviously don't know how to read your newsgroups line
[ ] You are trying to make money on a non-commercial newsgroup
[ ] You self-righteously impose your religious beliefs on others
[ ] You self-righteously impose your racial beliefs on others
[ ] You posted a binary in a non-binaries group
[ ] You don't know which group to post in
[x] You posted something totally uninteresting
[ ] You crossposted to *way* too many newsgroups
[x] I don't like your tone of voice
[ ] What you posted has been done before.
[ ] Not only that, it was also done better the last time.
[ ] You quoted an *entire* post in your reply
[x] You started a long, stupid thread
[ ] You continued spreading a long stupid thread
[x] Your post is absurdly off topic for where you posted it
[ ] You posted a followup to crossposted robot-generated spam
[ ] You posted a "test" in a discussion group rather than in alt.test
[x] You posted a "YOU ALL SUCK" message
[x] You posted low-IQ flamebait
[x] You posted a blatantly obvious troll
[ ] You followed up to a blatantly obvious troll
[ ] You said "me too" to something
[x] You make no sense
[ ] Your sig/alias is dreadful
[x] You must have spent your life in a skinner box to be this
clueless.
[ ] You posted a phone-sex ad
[ ] You posted a stupid pyramid money making scheme
[ ] You claimed a pyramid-scheme/chain letter for money was legal
[ ] Your margin settings (or lack of) make your post unreadable. Each
line just goes on and on, not stopping at 75 characters, making it
hard to read.
[ ] You posted in ELitE CaPitALs to look k0OwL
[ ] You posted a message in ALL CAPS, and you don't even own a TRS-80
[ ] Your post was FULL of RANDOM CAPS for NO APPARENT REASON
[x] You have greatly misunderstood the purpose of this mailing list.
[x] You have greatly misunderstood the purpose of the Internet.
[x] You are a loser.
[ ] This has been pointed out to you before.
[ ] You didn't do anything specific, but appear to be so generally
worthless that you are being flamed on general principles.
[x] You obviously can't read the FAQ.
[x] You obviously only post with one hand, while the other is busy
with self-gratification.
It is recommended that you:
[x] Get a clue
[x] Get a life
[x] Go away
[x] Grow up
[x] Never post again
[ ] Read every newsgroup you posted to for a week
[ ] stop reading Usenet news and get a life
[x] stop sending Email and get a life
[x] Bust up your modem with a hammer and eat it
[x] Have your medication adjusted
[x] Jump into a bathtub while holding your monitor
[x] find a volcano and throw yourself in
[ ] get a gun and shoot yourself
[x] Actually post something relevant
[ ] Read the FAQ
[ ] stick to FidoNet and come back when you've grown up
[x] Apologize to everybody in this mailing list
[ ] consume excrement
[x] consume excrement and thus expire
[x] get laid and expire
[ ] Post your tests to alt.test/misc.test
[ ] Put your home phone number in your ads from now on
[x] Refrain from posting until you have a vague idea what you're doing
In Closing, I'd Like to Say:
[ ] You need to seek psychiatric help
[x] Take your gibberish somewhere else
[x] *plonk*
[ ] Learn how to post or get off the usenet
[x] You need to take your head out of your ass
[x] You should be neutered before becoming old enough to breed
[ ] Most of the above
[x] All of the above
[ ] Some of the above, not including All of the above
[ ] You are so clueless that I didn't even bother filling in this
form
Chris Lyth
...................................................
I'm not sexist. I just don't trust anything that can bleed for 5
days and not die.